-- =================================================================== local QuoteList = { "After all is said and done, more has been said than done." , "A glass cat catches no mice." , "A kind heart is of little value in chess." , "Alea iacta est. [ The die is cast. ] -- Julius Caesar" , "All cats are gray in the dark. -- Benjamin Franklin" , "All roads lead to Trantor, and that is where all stars end." , "All that glitters has a high refractive index." , "A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience. -- Doug Larson" , "A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams. -- John Barrymore" , "Ancient Chinese Curse: May all your wishes be granted" , "Ancient Chinese Curse: May you live in interesting times" , "Methinks upon a sudden I am awaked as it were out of a dream. -- Robert Burton, 1621" , "An honest man's the noblest work of God." , "Another such victory over the Romans, and we are undone. -- Pyrrhus" , "A phaser is the universal communicator. -- Worf" , "A promise made is a debt unpaid." , "A shark with whiskey is mighty risky" , "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, If God won't have you, the Devil must." , "A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are for. -- John A. Shedd" , "A skillful sailor was never made on a calm sea." , "Be careful of what you wish for; you might get it." , "Be careful what you wish for. You never know who will be listening. -- Terry Pratchett" , "Beet ever so onion, there's snow peas legume." , "Buy low, sell high." , "By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail. -- Benjamin Franklin" , "'C' code. 'C' code run. Run, code, run." , "Chance favors the prepared mind. -- Louis Pasteur" , "Change your thoughts and you change your world." , "Climate is what you expect. Weather is what you get." , "Creditors have better memories than debtors. -- Benjamin Franklin" , "Destinations are often a surprise to the destined. -- Thessaly, \"Sandman\"" , "Did you know that SDRAWKCAB spelled backwards is backwards?" , "Dive into the waters of majority, see if you get clean. -- Steve Aylett" , "Dogs bark, but the caravan passes on." , "Don't tempt the gods, they love it." , "Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell, and advertise." , "Even a cabbage may look at a king." , "Even a hawk is an eagle among crows." , "Even God cannot change the past. -- Agathon (448 BC-400 BC)" , "Even the boldest zebra fears the hungry lion." , "Even the smallest candle burns brighter in the dark." , "Everything should be built top-down, except the first time." , "Everything you can imagine is real. -- Pablo Picasso" , "First things first, but not necessarily in that order. -- \"Doctor Who\"" , "Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose." , "Grandeur only works at low speed. -- Steve Aylett, \"Toxicology\"" , "Haiku: oh no godzilla | guns and planes cannot stop him tokyo is ablaze" , "Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible. -- Lord Kelvin, 1892" , "He is winding the watch of his wit; by and by it will strike. -- Shakespeare" , "He who laughs, lasts." , "He who rides the tiger cannot dismount." , "How many eggs could an eggplant plant if an eggplant could plant eggs?" , "I am, therefore I am. -- Akira" , "I don't want the world, I just want your half. -- TMBG, \"Ana Ng\"" , "If a fool would persist in his folly he would become wise" , "If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you" , "If if's and but's were candy and nuts, every day would be Christmas." , "If there are epigrams, there must be meta-epigrams." , "If tin whistles are made of tin, what are foghorns made of?" , "If you eat, you're on a diet. A diet is what you eat. -- Dr. Angus" , "If you're happy, you're successful." , "Immensity is less reproach than dismissal. -- Steve Aylett, \"Atom\"" , "In chess, it is always better to sacrifice your opponent's men." , "Intent and outcome are rarely coincident. -- Morpheus, \"Sandman\"" , "It beggar'd all description. -- Shakespeare" , "It is hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head. -- Sally Kempton" , "It is unwise to summon what you cannot dismiss. -- Morpheus, \"Sandman\"" , "It's almost cosmic." , "It's a wise bird who builds his nest in a tree." , "It's bad luck to be superstitious." , "It's the business of the future to be dangerous." , "I was born in truth's own city, Veritas. -- James Morrow, \"City of Truth\"" , "Let others praise ancient times; I am glad I was born in these. -- Ovid (43 BC-17 AD)" , "Life is complex; it consists of both real and imaginary parts." , "Life is what happens while you're making other plans. -- John Lennon" , "Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone." , "Logic is panic's prey." , "Luck is the residue of design." , "Maintain thine airspeed, lest the earth rise up and smite thee" , "Mathematics is the language which God used to write the universe." , "Memory serves wise commanders. -- Tz'u-hsi, 638 AD" , "Money is a good servant, but a bad master." , "Money talks. Mine says goodbye." , "Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. -- Red Auerbach" , "My reality check just bounced." , "My work is a game, a very serious game. -- M.C. Escher" , "Never cut what you can untie. -- Joseph Joubert" , "\"Nice jail. Looks strong.\" -- Harry Houdini" , "Only the phoenix arises and does not descend. -- \"Sandman\"" , "Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win. -- Jonathan Kozol" , "Prepare and prevent instead of repair and repent." , "Q: How do you count cows? A: With a cowculator" , "Remember, no matter where you go, there you are. -- Buckaroo Banzai" , "Save the whales. Collect the whole set." , "Seize the day." , "Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle which fits them all." , "Spyware flocks to MS-Windows like fleas to a dog. -- Linux proverb" , "Success is a journey, not a destination." , "Tears cannot restore her. Therefore I weep." , "Tell the truth and run. -- Yugoslavian proverb" , "The best way to predict the future is to invent it." , "The bogosity meter just pegged." , "The busy bee has no time for sorrow. -- William Blake" , "The buyer needs a hundred eyes, the seller not one. -- George Herbert" , "The cold wind of hope blows eternal." , "The corn is never found innocent in the court of the chickens. -- Finnish proverb" , "The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend. -- Robertson Davies" , "The fool wonders, the wise man asks. -- Benjamin Disraeli" , "The future is not set. There is no fate but what we make for ourselves. -- John Connor" , "The greatest of faults is to be conscious of none." , "The hardest part of the journey is said to be the passing of the gate." , "The last man on Earth sat alone in a room. There was a knock on the door." , "The mind is not a vessel to be filled but a fire to be lit. -- Plutarch" , "The one time Blince got near a fact his hair caught fire. -- Steve Aylett, \"Atom\"" , "The past is like a foreign country. They do things differently there." , "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom. -- William Blake" , "The smallest fact is a window through which the infinite may be seen." , "The ticket to the future is always blank. -- Vash the Stampede, \"Trigun\"" , "The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction. -- William Blake" , "The truth is easiest to disprove -- its defenses are down. -- Steve Aylett" , "The truth is never dangerous. Except when told. -- Philip Moeller" , "The wine remembers." , "The wise man trusts only in lies. -- Roald Dahl" , "The world is coming to an end. Save your buffers." , "There are no degrees of honesty." , "They also surf who only stand on waves." , "Time and tide wait for no man." , "Time is the devourer of all things. -- Ovid" , "Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend. -- Theophrastus" , "To err is human; to moo, bovine." , "To iterate is human; to recurse, divine." , "Trifles make perfection, but perfection itself is no trifle. -- Joseph Conrad" , "Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do." , "\"UNIX for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.\" -- Matthew 19:12" , "Value's in the mind of the buyer, not the peddler. -- Lucien, \"Sandman\"" , "War is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ketchup is a vegetable." , "We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails." , "Well done is better than well said. -- Benjamin Franklin" , "What color is a chameleon on a mirror?" , "What happens to the hole when the cheese is gone? -- Bertolt Brecht" , "When a man tells you he became rich through hard work, ask him whose" , "When in darkness, Or in doubt, Run in circles, Scream and shout" , "When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws." , "Where ignorance is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise. -- Thomas Gray" , "Where you stand depends on where you sit." , "Whom computers would destroy, they must first drive mad." , "Why do we drive on a parkway, and park in a driveway?" , "Why was six scared of seven? Because seven eight nine" , "Words must be weighed, not counted." , "Yard by yard, life is hard; by the inch, it's a cinch. -- Betty Hinman" , "You get what you give." , "You've got to feed the horses if you want the wagon pulled." , "YYUR YYUB ICUR YY4ME" , } -- =================================================================== local function chat_and_irc (msg) minetest.chat_send_all (msg) if minetest.get_modpath ("irc") then if irc.say ~= nil then irc.say (msg) end end end -- =================================================================== minetest.register_chatcommand ("fortune", { params = "" , description = "Deep thoughts" , func = function (name, params) local quote = QuoteList [math.random (#QuoteList)] minetest.chat_send_player (name, quote) end , }) -- =================================================================== minetest.register_chatcommand ("impeach", { params = "" , description = "Impeach an official" , func = function (name, params) minetest.chat_send_player (name, "Impeached") end , })